I always seem to find myself swallowed up by and stuck in vicious circles.
Patterns of bad behaviour that are spurned on by other bad behaviours and in turn, create more bad behaviours.
I think it is positive that I can recognise this, but it is always so damn hard to break these patterns and stop the cycle!
My ‘old faithful’ vicious circle, which Im sure many people can empathise with, is that of how well/bad I take care of myself and my self confidence. It is always with me, just at varying degrees of severity.
Presently, my diet is dreadful, I am not exercising and have subsequently hidden myself away, not wanting to go out and have people see me. Because I eat shit, I feel shit, have no motivation for exercise or socialising and so of course, I go and eat more shit. Vicious circle.
I am currently attempting to break this cycle and after a few days of positive changes, I am already feeling better. I am eating more veggies, less sugar and am preparing for the gym. Haha Im starting slowly. I know how great I felt last year when I was exercising regularly and had a decent diet. I need to get back to that.
It is all about playing mind games with myself. If someone tells me to do something, my immediate reaction is to do the opposite. Im stubborn. I have to find ways to trick myself into doing things that are good for me. Im great at talking myself into negative things and out of positive things. I need to do something about that. Im a glass half empty person, clearly.